Saint Francis de Sales says, “Love is the chief amongst the passions of the soul. It is King of all the heart’s impulses; it draws all things to itself, and makes us like to what we love.” In today’s society, we are taught to act on impulse when one is attracted to another. However, Francis de Sales preaches something much different. He states that frivolous friendships can be damaging to our salvation if acted upon without sincere discernment.
When one enters a relationship with immoral intentions Saint Francis defines these as foolish friendships. Francis de Sales states that the when two people enter into a friendship without the intention of marriage it is called flirtations. These friendships are founded on lust, vanity and selfishness. People who enter into such friendship are only interested in indulging their own senses. This type of attraction has no foundation of Christ’s teaching and therefore is not pure love but rather lust.
Impure flirtations can be damaging to one's soul because these attractions foster sin. One’s soul becomes weak and more vulnerable to sin. Having careless relations with another will lead one to sin as well as lead others to sin. Dangerous attractions divert the soul away from things that are pure and holy. These attractions lead the heart away from God whom we should love above all else. Saint Francis writes, “God demands all our entire love in gratitude of our creation, preservation, and redemption…” It is easy to be blinded by foolish love and forget that we must first surrender our love to God. In order to have a relationship that is wholesome and moral God must be the main focus.
It is easy to fall into these types of relations. However, in order to avoid evil friendships, as Saint Francis writes, one must remember that their heart is “dedicated to God, and your love sacrificed to Him…Call upon God, He will succor you, and His Love will protect yours.” Our hearts first belong to the Lord. If we find ourselves struggling with tempting relations we must “Hasten into the presence of God, acknowledge before Him your weakness and vanity, and then abandon all these follies…” God's love for us is greater than any love we can receive on earth. He will not forsake us.
In conclusion, to translate Saint Francis' words, when one enters into an unblessed friendship without pure intentions one is flirting with the devil and his evil deeds. As a result, these flippant relations have sinful consequences. However, God's love for us is greater than any love we can receive on Earth and we must not forget that.
